Ep #160: Taking a Life Pause

You are listening to The Midlife Sex Coach for Women™ Podcast episode 160.

Welcome to The Midlife Sex Coach for Women™ Podcast, the only show that combines a fun personality, medical knowledge, sexual counseling, and life coaching together. To create unique sex coaching that helps busy women awaken their libidos, address intimacy issues, and learn how to express their sexuality for the rest of their days. Here is your host, certified life coach and sexual counselor, Dr. Sonia Wright.

Hello, hello, hello, Diamonds. How are you doing today? So I turned 57 this week and this is the start of my new journey around the sun for 365 days. And I’m spending some time in reflection and thinking what I want the next 365 days to be about for me. And I have decided that it’s time for a life pause. My brain and my soul have been telling me it’s time for a pause and I finally decided to listen. It definitely was time for me to listen.

I have to say that I have not been very good in life about this pause thing. Most of the time I just go and go and go, I jump from one project to the next, managing kids and relationships and work to the point of burnout. But I decided a number of years ago that I’m not doing that anymore, that there’s a different way to do this. And of course I want to be an example as to what is possible for myself, my family and for my Diamonds. I want you to know that it’s possible to have a life pause.

Now, I understand that it’s okay to take a break. Life is meant to be enjoyed and not necessarily running from one event or activity to the next, to the next. So what exactly does a pause look like? That’s a really good question and you can make it mean and look like whatever you want. That’s the fun thing about a life pause, it’s your life, it’s your pause, and you can decide in what area you want to do this pause.

So as I discussed, when it comes to a pause, listen and ask yourself what you need. Is there anywhere in life that you actually need a pause? This is a question. And this is a beautiful time. I love asking this question right now because we’re going into the fall. And I think traditionally for me, the fall and the winter are about slowing down and really focusing on what’s important. And so it makes sense that this would be the time that I am looking at a life pause.

So what is a pause? Well, went to the Googles and they said that a pause is a temporary stop in action and I would add in order to breathe. So it’s a temporary stop in action in order to breathe, in order to ponder, in order to figure something out. You get to just be and assess what you would like your life to be about. What would you enjoy about your life and what would you, might possibly wish to change about your life? That’s a question. What do you currently enjoy about it and what would you like to change about it?

And when we’re talking about change, I have to admit that there’s been a lot of change for me in the last year or the last couple of years I should say. I went from being a single woman with one tween daughter to a married woman with two tweens, a boy and a girl. And we recently added a new child to our family, yes. And if I’m also taking Julian into consideration, who’s my oldest, he’s 24 right now then I am now the proud mother of four children. And gee, I never thought of myself as the mother of four children, but somehow that has happened.

And in the last couple of years, I’ve also created two new programs and I started my radiology, a new radiology job. I’m a pediatric radiologist and that’s something that I love, enjoy doing and I decided that I would continue to do that part-time. So my life is completely different in the last two years. And I’ve found that it’s time to pause so that I can spend some time looking and deciding what is important for me. And as I said just a minute ago, I did add a wonderful new child to my family. I’m so excited about her.

Now. I have two boys and two girls. Her name is Naya and she’s 15 years old and she’s amazing and with adding another child to the family that brings my total to four kids. And being a mom is one of the most important things for me. Being the best mom that I can be is definitely important. And I’m realizing that my family needs more of me at this time and this is also contributing to my pause.

And I’m also realizing that I have a fifth baby and my fifth baby is the Lit Clit Club. And I’m finding that I really want to devote time to my family and also to developing my fifth baby which is the Lit Clit Club and making it all that I want it to be. And because I want to focus on my family and the Lit Clit Club, I’m finding that I need to pare down some of my other services.

I don’t exactly know how everything’s going to look, but I do know that I’m shifting this round of ACWSI, Advanced Certification in Women’s Sexual Intimacy into 2024 because I’m devoting a number of extra time and hours to going basically through the tenth grade with my newest daughter.

So we sit together for several hours going over homework in the evening and just making sure that her life is how we want it to be for her and to be there for her. So it is also leading to this pause. For right now I know it’s time for a pause, for renewal, for spiritual renewal, business renewal, family and life relationships. That’s kind of where I’m focusing everything. And I’m going to step out in faith and courage and listen to what my heart says. And my heart is saying that I need a life pause at this moment.

I don’t have it all figured out but I know enough that when my heart, my spirit talks to me, it’s very important for me to listen and so I am going to be doing that. I’m going to be doing that and giving myself that gift. I also have to say three years ago, I gave myself another gift. I started this podcast and I’m so excited as to what I’ve created in the last three years and what I’m going to be creating in the future. And I have a feeling this podcast is going to be changing too, so stay tuned for that.

At this moment I’m not putting it on pause, but I am going to focus on how I can make this an even better podcast. So if you have any ideas, feel free to reach out. The email is in the show notes and I would just love to know what else you would like this podcast to have. Do you want more interviews? Do you want more topics? Just let me know what it is that you’d like to focus on. I’m here to listen.

I used to see taking a pause as a weakness and now I realize it takes a lot of strength in order to decide to put things on hold for a moment to say, “Wait a minute, it’s time for me to breathe and it’s time for me to make some decisions for myself and for my growing family.” So I am deciding to pause and make those decisions. And I’m also asking you what it is that you’d like to pause and just assess and breathe into and decide what’s best for you.

So as we enter the fall and we head into the winter, I’m asking all my Diamonds, what does a life pause look like for you? What would you like that to look like? Where would you like to focus that pause? It’s just a moment in time and space where we breathe into it, where we slow down and we get to look at what our life looks like, what we want to keep, what we want to add to, what we might be willing to let go of.

And so as I’m doing this life pause, I invite my Diamonds to do this life pause with me. Alright, Diamonds, short and sweet this week. I will talk to you again soon. Alright, take care. Dr. Sonia out.

Hello, hello, hello, Diamonds, have you heard the amazing news? Dr. Sonia, that would be me and my amazing team has started a sex coaching and life coaching monthly membership program called The Lit Clit Club. The Lit Clit Club was made just for you. It’s a safe place where women can come to create the lives that they want, the lives that you want. It’s a place where you get to talk openly about your sexual concerns and be heard. There’s no judgment, no reprimand, no labels, just acceptance, knowledge and freedom.

It’s a place where you get to ask all the questions that you ever wanted to ask about sex and about life too. You get to dream big and create your life your way inside and outside the bedroom. You know I love the concept of creating the life that you want inside and outside the bedroom, that soul bursting life that you deserve. So come to the club for the sexual intimacy coaching and stay for the empowerment and the freedom.

Do you have questions about libido, menopause? Lord help us, menopause is no joke. Sexual health, relationships, sexual orientation, pleasure equality and orgasms, religion and intimacy? I am not finished with this list yet. Maybe you have questions about toys, maybe about non-monogamy. Perhaps you’re interested in BDSM, maybe self-love, self-pleasure. Maybe you have questions about self-orientation. Maybe you need to work on healing from trauma.

Maybe body image is something that you want to focus more on and definitely embodiment. Perhaps creating the life of your dreams or journeying to your authentic self. Maybe you just want to stop people pleasing. Whatever questions you have and concerns you have, we have the answers and the coaching that you need. In all actuality, you have the answers inside of you. And the coaching will help bring that out. And you know what? You get to choose how you want to be coached.

You can be coached by video, by audio only or you can use the questions and answers session, it’s whatever works for you. You get to sit back and relax and get the help that you need and your cameras are off. And every month we have a new workshop in addition to our regular coaching sessions. So click on the link below in the show notes and find out more about The Lit Clit Club. We can’t wait to see you there in the club, come join us. Things are just starting to heat up. Alright, Dr. Sonia out. Love you all, Diamonds.